Conversation with Maryn & Dylan

I don't always get up on time. I am trying to be better at this because I know by putting myself in a situation to rush it is not only affecting me, but everyone else as well. Today was supposed to be a morning of utter change and positivity. I was to get up at 5am, go to the gym, have a perfectly prepared and organized morning. At 7:15, as I wiped the sleep from my eyes and nudged a sleepy daddy, I said to myself...."Let's try this again tomorrow shall we! No, no...I don't hate you....you tried your best.....really you did. I saw how you turned off all three alarm clocks you set! That was hard work!....Tomorrow I just know you will succeed! Chin up you rock star!"

I don't think many kids do well with a fast paced morning. Mine are no exception. Usually if I am in a hurry, I try to convince them that I am getting them dressed in their rooms because it is oh so cold downstairs and I just cannot bare the thought of presenting them to such an environment. As I am moving around their sleepy, ragdoll bodies their impression is that it is only out of pure love that I would put them through such torture. As I am doing this I also try to impress upon them how awesomely cool it would be to have our cold dry cereal in baggies and.......get this......actually EAT IT ON THE WAY TO SCHOOL!!!! I know.....I AM the best mom ever!!!

Maryn is what people have called "scary smart" and I totally believe she has caught on and is appeasing me by buying into everything I am saying. Dylan, not so much. He is not happy about this at all.

As I am trying to get him dressed, he is whining, pouting, and rolling around on his bed making it virtually impossible to help him with his pants. I decide to give up and go to the one that is patronizingly compliant which makes Dylan only more angry that I have left him and refuse to be a part of his "Check Out How Angry I Can Be" episode. I end up having to give him a pop on his bottom for an ugly attitude he is giving me, which makes Maryn start to cry a little. I explained to her and him that the way Dylan was acting was unacceptable and that it was his choice to change the behavior, the rest goes as follows:

Mommy: Dylan, you need to take a good look at yourself and the way you are acting and figure out how you should be acting so we can finish getting ready.

Dylan: "I CAN'T"

Mommy: Yes you can, and you will

Dylan: "I CAN'T"

Maryn: Mommy, I think he means he can't look at himself

Dylan: "I HAVE A HEAD"

Maryn: He means he can only see you on the outside...not the inside of his head...we can't really see our insides