Sometimes I Fail

I realize that a more accurate title would likely be "On the Rare Occasion I Get It Right". I know I do not stand alone as a parent when at the end of the day I am all too aware that I have screwed up. I was irritable, I was cranky, I was unforgiving, I was brooding around with that face that makes me catch my breath if I have the misfortune of stumbling across a mirror.

With Maryn's wonderfully enhanced vocabulary she can now say to me, "mommy...don't scream at me". What this makes me realize is that I have passed on to my daughter my penchant for overexagerating. Screamed, I did not. Talked loudly, very likely on certain days.

As always, Catherine Newman knows just how to say it:

"The thing is, I am forever snapping at them and exasperated. I come after them in my awful, neurotic way with wet washcloths and hand sanitizer and sunscreen and bug spray and I ruin their lives. I nag them to finish their milk and brush their teeth and clean up the living room and be careful on the stairs and stop scratching my back with their revolting toenails. I wiggle teeth and dig out splinters and turn an appraising eye to their moles and scalps and infected bug bites and red throats. They are too loud and too wild and too whiny and too bickery and too hot to be crawling all over me like that. But still I can't get over the miracle of having them here."

Maryn and Dylan:
In the process of ruining your life may I never, ever get over the miracle of having you here!